Hey, Sweetie

       So I'm sitting here tonight, after playing tug with Chloe and working on drive, realizing that we've been together for almost 3 years now. It's quite hard to believe actually. I never seem to realize that time truly does fly, and we take life for granted, no matter how much we like to think that we don't, we do. I guess that's one of those things that makes us human, huh? We all have a best friend, some more than one. My boyfriend who ships out on the 15th will be gone for 3 months, I've talked to him almost every day of my life for the past 11 years, and I'm going to be completely and utterly lost without him. After sitting down at work today after being sent home because I "wasn't myself" it really hit me, I felt like I was going to be alone, and I cried, sitting in the lobby of my work, I cried, it was almost pathetic actually. I'm hard on myself a lot, because I just don't feel I deserve the things that life grants me most the time, so I feel I should have to work so much harder to make myself worthy of it all. I know its ridiculous but it's just how I feel.
        A few weeks ago Rockit swallowed a (what I believe to be) lead curtain weight, causing him to become extremely ill. Before I got him to a vet I hoped it was simply and upset stomach as he had a raw meal for the first time in quite a while, or maybe there was something wrong with my bag of kibble, or something that I did wrong, I felt it was my fault. From the time I got Rockit he has always caused trouble, eating and chewing anything and everything he can fit into his mouth, it's absolutely horrid. The day I brought him home I had plugged my phone in when I got home, not thinking anything of it because that's where I had always plugged it in and my dogs knew better than to mess with wires, guess who didn't have a phone charger within five minutes? This girl. Thanks Rockit. Seems I haven't learned my lesson though, or maybe Rockit is just accident prone? Now that he's home from his surgery and "on the road to recovery" he's injured himself again, somehow managing to slice open his leg, does it never end with this dog? Guess not.
       As for Pearl and Vixy, they both got new collars (Rush to Tug of course, because Reesa is the absolute best!) and they're doing simply wonderful. With the new dog food and the added salmon oil and ACV they all look amazing. Vixy has lost some weight but is still working on shedding those few extra pounds that she really doesn't need to have hanging around. Pearl seems to be not aging well at all sadly, but we continue to hope and pray for the best and ask the Gods and Goddesses that she stay with us for many years to come.
        Now, back to the point of this post. What is a best friend? Well, I see a best friend as the one who will never leave your side, the one that's going to go through everything with you, just to stay with you, not because they have to, but because they want to. That's what I define as a best friend. That's what I define as Chloe. I've never had a dog before that has changed me like she has, yes, each of my dogs has changed me in one way or another and they have all taught me something, but Chloe? Chloe has showed me a whole new world. She's sparked a flame that will never be extinguished. Before Chloe I thought often of suicide and was a cutter, she saved me, she showed me that it's ok to hurt, that even though it hurts it'll be alright. She stood by me through everything. My senior year was rough, after losing quite a few classmates (mostly to car accidents) I started to shut down, I simply don't handle loss well anymore after experiencing it so much. I started to give up on everything, including myself and my dogs, but Chloe was just so eager to help me. She is the one that got me back on my feet, the one that made me realize I can't let anything slow me down, even when it hurts I have to push on. I have dreams, and because of Chloe I know it's ok to chase them. So Chloe, through all the mistakes, screw ups, disasters, tragedy, and anything else that is thrown our way, I'm going to be your best friend, and you'll always be mine <3 I love you baby girl.